Single parents deserve all the more respect for raising a child by themselves. It takes a different level of strength to do so, definitely more than it takes with a partner. Raising a child as a couple is hard enough; raising a child as a single parent, no matter what the reasons are for doing it solo, requires so much more strength, patience and courage.
May it be that that decision was because of a divorce, death of a partner, or never even getting married; we should never judge a parents situation or decision, because being in that situation requires so much strength, that those people should be applauded, never judged.
Children who grow up in such a household don’t have a conventional family at home. Therefore, it’s understandable when they don’t have the same ideas about love and relationships as others might.
Given below are 10 ways in which such children grow up having different sense of love and relationships:
1. HAVING TRUST ISSUES
Children of single parents will grow up having reservations about whichever gender of the relationship was missing from their childhood years. If the father was absent, the child will face difficulties in forming any easy bond with males. It’s the same case when it comes to mothers and women.
On a subconscious level, there is a deep mistrust and doubt which affects future relationships. This is because such a person will always assume that you might leave as easily as their absent parent did.
2. BUT ONCE THEY WARM UP TO YOU, SUCH PEOPLE TRUST WITH THEIR WHOLE HEART
It’s difficult to make such people let their guards down as they have it covered with multiple layers of distrust and a hard shell on top for protecting themselves. But once you do so, they will accept you with all their heart.
Love and trust comes slow for them, but when they do it, they give it all!
3. LOYALTY TRUMPS EVERYTHING
Very few people are allowed inside the trust circle of these people. Once they let them in, they provide them all the love and trust and expect the same back.
You can be sure they won’t ever break your trust and make sure that you don’t break theirs. Otherwise, that would crush them.
4. DON’T MAKE UNREALISTIC PROMISES
The doubt that has been seeded in such people makes them mistrust everyone right of the bat. Even before you do something to disappoint them, they probably have formed that notion about you. So it’s very important to keep your promises that you made to them.
5. SUCH PEOPLE ARE MORE INDEPENDENT THAN OTHERS
A single parent usually has to work longer hours to provide better, which is letting the child become independent from a young age. Instead of looking towards others for advice, they rely on their own wit and wisdom.
Having no other option sometimes, self-sufficiency is something at which these people excel at.
6. THEY FEAR REJECTION
They have a constant feeling of rejection surrounding their sense of self, given the idea that one of their parents “rejected” them. This feeling makes them fear rejection by people.
If you reject them, they might withdraw back and shut themselves emotionally.
7. THEY FEAR ABANDONMENT EVEN MORE
The love such people receive from others could be in use to fill the void in their heart. Carrying the notion of being abandoned by a parent makes them very sensitive towards such scenarios.
Deserting such people will result in severe emotional distress for them.
8. THEY RESOLVE TO NOT BE A SINGLE PARENT THEMSELVES
Having missed the presence of the other parent in their lives, such people usually are very bent towards giving their children a different upbringing. They understand how sad and difficult it becomes for a child to adjust with such a scenario, therefore, they will do everything in their power to prevent their children from that pain.
9. THEY ARE SKEPTICAL OF EVERLASTING LOVE
Having seen their parent live their lives without a happily ever after, these people are naturally skeptical about this concept.
Although they received all the love and care from their single parent, watching them go about their lives without it makes a huge impact on the psyche of such kids.
10. BUT DEEP DOWN THEY DO BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF LOVE
A love that lasts is something these people have craved for their entire lives. Love isn’t treated lightly by them, and especially so because they want a secure and whole future for their kids.
So while other people might pay more attention to fame, wealth or adventure, these people will choose love.
A childhood with a single parent brings many changes in a child, all of them without any conscious choice. Vulnerable yet kind, these people are the best of the lot and you should treat them with the love and respect they deserve.