Toxic people come in various forms and sizes.
They’re the narcissists, the compulsive liars, the sociopaths, manipulators, gossipers, and negative nencies who have the capacity to spread lower vibrations all around them.
No matter how much we try to raise our vibration, we just can’t avoid bumping into these low vibration people. This happens because toxic people are actually hurt people who need healing, and avoiding them will not heal the world.
We can’t completely eliminate toxic people from our lives, especially when they’re our colleagues, family members, or neighbors.
You don’t need to avoid them completely, however, you don’t have to be affected by their negativity either because that is even worse.
If we’re not aware, their negative vibrations can drag us into their level and block the light we’re trying to shine upon the world. But there are smart ways you can be in their company and yet, be bulletproof to their negativity.
1. Avoid giving them the attention they want to suck from others.
Parties or similar gatherings where there are a lot of people are the most favorable situations for toxic people to act out and get the attention they want.
They may talk or laugh out loud. Avoid becoming their audience by spending your precious time with a group of few and quieter people.
2. Avoid spending time with people who talk bad about others.
Backbiting is one bad habit of toxic people. If they start talking about others including their darkest secrets, don’t be fooled by believing they’re sharing it with you because you gain their trust.
They’re likely to betray you the same way they betray others. What’s worse, they may use your words against you so that when things mess up, you’re all to blame.
3. Do not put your full guard down with extremely nice and charming people.
Manipulative people are very good at fooling other people’s emotions. They will use every means and tactic to win you over.
What people want the most? Someone to agree with everything they say, be extremely nice and treat them like kings. Manipulators act exactly like that.
Watch out when someone is excessively charming or kind to you. It’s a signal that they’re up for something fishy. Listen when your gut feeling warns you through strange feelings of inadequacy in their presence. Feelings of being deceived are rarely wrong.
4. If you notice someone is lying, make it fun.
When you sense that someone is lying, don’t confront them immediately. This creates negativity. Instead, play a game with them, make it fun.
Regardless of how they fabricate their seemingly perfect stories, their lies will soon crumble before their eyes. The stories they tell will have more flaws and contradictions each time they recall them.
So just listen to how far they can go with trying to lie. You can even play a game where you act as you completely believe them and ask tricky questions to trap them in their lie.
5. Ignore insults and negative words.
Toxic people have a vocabulary of insults and negativity. But their words don’t have to affect you. Do not try to get to their level, even though sometimes we unconsciously start talking as the peers we talk to. The moment you realize it, try not to get affected.
Remember, the words of toxic people have less to do with you, and everything to do with them and the reality they live in. It often has something to do with their insecurities.
6. Don’t give in to the drama of self pity.
Toxic people use their self pity almost as a conversation starter. They believe that by acting as a victim of life, people or something will give them what they want.
Whatever the reasons, they have the responsibility of changing their own reality. Listening to their woes constantly not only encourages them to stay comfortable in that place but also drags you to the lower vibrations that they put themselves into.
So try to avoid and steer away from such conversations. But sometimes, if you can’t avoid such conversations, at least do not participate.
Instead of giving your opinion about the situation, just listen to their woes and talk less.
This way, they’ll pick up the cue that you can give nothing to them more than a listening ear.
7. Avoid playing mind games.
Toxic people often respond in an indirect way because they can’t be honest with themselves.
Toxic people love playing mind games. It’s how they manipulate people without having the spotlight on them.
Be direct when talking with them. If you want an answer, ask them with questions that only evoke a yes or no response. If you think they are dishonest, tell them. If you notice that they play with a certain agenda, tell them.
8. Beware of the false kindness.
Nobody is always kind. If they are, than either they are not honest with you, or with their own emotions. Whatever the case, always kindness it’s false kindness.
If someone is extremely kind to you, and you feel there’s something off, it’s a sure sign they’re doing it for a shady reason they alone know. Whatever their intentions, beware.
9. Keep your emotions in check.
Toxic people have their way of drawing negative emotions out of you. If you’re not in control of yourself, they’re likely to succeed in dragging you to their negative vibrations.
Hence, it’s essential that you keep your emotions in check when you’re dealing with toxic people. Do not mix your emotions in the conversation, keep them to yourself.
If you notice someone is trying to provoke you, or critique you with intent to make you negative, step aside from their game. Realize they just seek connection, it’s not personal.
10. Focus on the constructive solutions instead of the problems.
When problems arise, toxic people often look for whom to blame. It’s easier for them to blame than to look for solutions.
If you are in such situation try to focus on the constructive solutions because no matter how you pinpoint the guilty party, the problems wont go away if they are not solved. Focusing on the solution allows the good vibrations to flourish despite the mishaps around.